Wizards of Raccoondominium

THE RACCOONS FAN FICTION

WIZARDS OF RACCOONDOMINIUM

Written by Stephen Ricketts & Jacob Turner


The Raccoons © Skywriter Media & Entertainment Group
Michelle Raccoon © Michelleraccoon
Alicia, Melanie & Zoza © Alicia Martin
My Little Pony © Hasbro


THE EVERGREEN FOREST
NARRATOR: 'Summer was ending in the Evergreen Forest, and fall was near. And Bert Raccoon, now having a part time job at the Blue Spruce Cafe, and Mr. Willow's store, was now finding another job to do.'

K-N-O-X TV STUDIO
Bert was being interviewed by Mr. Knox.
MR. KNOX: 'I am pleased you're auditioning for the role in our next campaign for our new Ripling Pond Soda. You do know there is not a peanut butter flavour, don't you?'
BERT: (surprised) 'There isn't?'
MR. KNOX: 'But if you're okay with trying any of our existing flavours, you might still get the part. The audition is this Saturday.'
BERT: 'I'll be there. Err, what flavours do you already have?'
MR. KNOX: 'We got orange, apple, lemon, lime, strawberry and black current.'
BERT: 'Then I'll try the orange soda.'
MR. KNOX: 'Excellent choice. One more thing, Bert. Why do you want this job? I know you're already working for Schaeffer and Mr. Willow. If you get too many jobs, you won't have much of a social life.'
BERT: 'It's great to hear you're concerned about me, but I have my reasons. I'm saving up a lot of money to buy something expensive.'
MR. KNOX: 'I see. Well, I'd better let you go now. See you on Saturday.'
BERT: 'See ya, Knox.'
Bert ran off.
MR. KNOX: (talking to himself) 'For a moment there, I thought he was gonna bankrupt the Sneer business *chuckles*.'

THE RACCOONS' HOME
Lisa was sitting on a sofa, reading a book, when Bentley ran down stairs.
BENTLEY: 'Lisa. Harry Potter starts in an hour.'
LISA: (looking at her watch) 'Oh my gosh, you're right, Bentley. We'd better get going. We'll stop by at Michelle's to see if she wants to go.'

MICHELLE RACCOON'S HOME
Michelle Raccoon was watching "My Little Pony Friendship is Magic" on TV.
PINKIE PIE: (on TV) 'You know what this calls for? A party.'
The doorbell rang, and Michelle answered it. It was Bentley and Lisa.
MICHELLE: 'Hi guys. What brings you guys here?'
LISA: 'We're gonna go to the cinema to see "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2". Wanna come?'
MICHELLE: 'No thank you. I'm not really interested in Harry Potter.'
LISA: 'Oh. Well, thanks for letting me know. So, what are you doing now?'
MICHELLE: 'Oh I'm just watching "My Little Pony Friendship is Magic" on TV.'
BENTLEY: (upset) 'Oh no, not you too, Michelle.'
LISA: 'I've been watching that show too.'
MICHELLE: 'You like it?'
LISA: 'Oh yeah.'
BENTLEY: 'I don't.'
MICHELLE: (to Bentley) 'You should give it a chance. I know some boys who like this series. Some are as old as Bert.'
BENTLEY: 'Really?'
MICHELLE: 'Yes. Please do it, for me.'
BENTLEY: (blushing) 'Okay, Michelle.'
LISA: (to Michelle) 'You know Twilight Sparkle? She sounds almost like my old friend Donna.'
MICHELLE: 'Twilight sounds like your old friend? Unbelievable.'
BENTLEY: 'That's because Tara Strong…'
LISA: (covering Bentley's mouth) 'Quiet Bentley!'
Michelle giggled.
LISA: (removing her hand from Bentley's mouth) 'I've enjoyed the series. My favourite characters are Twilight and Rainbow Dash. What about yours?'
MICHELLE: 'I like Pinkie Pie.'
BENTLEY: 'I hate to interrupt, but the movie starts in forty minutes.'
LISA: 'Okay, buster. Don't get your pants in a knot.'
BENTLEY: 'But I'm not wearing pants.'
Lisa groaned.
PENNY: (running in) 'Are you guys gonna see Harry Potter?'
LISA: 'Err, yeah. How did you know?'
PENNY: 'Bentley phoned me a few minutes ago.'
Bentley smiled innocently.

THE SNEER MANSION: THE OFFICE
Cyril was talking with Mr. Knox on the phone.
CYRIL: 'Our new soda range will sell like hot cakes, as they are made from pure fruits. Ingrid is definitely a genius when it comes to the environment. What? That raccoon is gonna audition for the TV commercial? Doesn't that guy have enough jobs already? Well, if he gets the job, he'd better not screw it up, like he did with my Success cologne commercial. Good day, Knox.'
He hung up his phone.

THE RACCOONS' HOME: BENTLEY'S ROOM
It was night time, and Bentley was settling down in bed.
BENTLEY: 'That movie was great. I hope I have a good dream tonight.'
He turned off the bedroom lamp and went to sleep.

BENTLEY'S DREAM
THE RACCOONS' HOME
Bentley and Lisa ran out of the home, wearing their normal clothes.
LISA: 'Come on, Bentley, or we'll be late.'
BENTLEY: 'I'm coming.'
They ran up to their old club house, and Lisa got out her magic wand. She casted a spell, and a the door into the clubhouse opened, revealing a glowing light on the other side. The two raccoons ran into the light.

GOTHIC CASTLE
Bentley and Lisa came in from an archway. Their clothes had magically changed into uniforms, similar to what the students wore in "Harry Potter".
LISA: 'We made it in time. (To Bentley) Don't be late for class again.'
BENTLEY: (irritated) 'All right.'

MISS. PRIMROSE'S CLASSROOM
Bentley was sitting with Penny in the classroom, as they paid attention to Miss. Primrose.
MISS. PRIMROSE: 'Class, today, we'll learn how to switch places with another.'
PENNY: 'You mean like brain swapping?'
MISS PRIMROSE: *giggles* 'No, Penny. You say a person's full name followed by the spell, and you switch places with that person. Imagine that you are in this room, and Bentley was relaxing on the green at the same time. You cast the spell with his name. You'll be sent to the green and…'
PENNY: 'And Bentley will be sent here. Cool.'
BENTLEY: 'Sounds a bit scary if you ask me.'
MISS PRIMROSE: 'Well, it looks like I got my two volunteers. Penny, stay with me, and Bentley, stand by the main door.'
BENTLEY: 'Yes, Miss Primrose.'
Bentley got up from his desk and stood by the door.
MISS PRIMROSE: 'Okay Penny. Wave your wand, and say "Bentley Raccoon Transplacius".
PENNY: (waving her wand) 'Bentley Raccoon Transplacius!'
They was a flash, and a puff of smoke. Bentley was now standing beside Miss Primrose. And Penny was now standing by the door.
PENNY: 'Wow, it worked.'
All of a sudden the place shook.
BENTLEY: 'Earthquake!'
MISS PRIMROSE: 'I'm afraid it's worse than that. It's he who must not be named.'
The kids gasped.
MISS PRIMROSE: 'Don't you worry kids. Bert can handle him. He's a full pledged wizard.'
BENTLEY: (mumbling) 'Full pledged wizard my ringtail.'
PENNY: 'Do I detect a bit of jealousy.'
An image of Schaeffer appeared before the class. He was seen with a long beard.
PENNY: 'It's Professor Schaeffer. Our head teacher.'
SCHAEFFER: 'Class, I have good news. Bert Raccoon is now taking on you-know-who as we speak.'
BENTLEY: 'I can't sit around here while Bert the brave grabs all the glory. (Holds up his wand) Bert Raccoon Transplacius!'
MISS PRIMROSE/ PENNY/ VARIOUS STUDENTS: 'NOOOO!!!'

QUARRY AREA
Bentley materialised in the area. There was a dark cloud in the sky, with the sound of thunder and flashes of lightning occurring.
BENTLEY: 'Now I can take on this you-know-who all by myself, ha-ha-ha-ha!'
All of a sudden, Bentley was spooked by a familiar evil laugh, which echoed around the area. The clouds magically formed a giant Cyril Sneer, wearing a purple cloak, with the Sneer symbol on the front.
CYRIL: 'So, an inexperienced wizard has used the body switching spell out of jealousy with one of the greatest wizards of this generation. Do you think you stand a chance against Sneervort? Well?'
BENTLEY: (scared) I… err… I… (Holds up the wand) Bert Raccoon Transplacius!'
Nothing happened.
SNEERVORT: 'You obviously didn't know the downside to the spell. You can't use the same person's name again for another twelve hours. You are trapped here now. Now you wish you hadn't done a stupid move like that. Don't bother worrying about getting a detention. You won't get the chance to!'
He raised his hands and fired jolts of lightning, conjured up evil demons in the form of dark purple mist. The demon mist descended to the ground, and took physical shape. The mist took the form some familiar characters from the original "My Little Pony" series. Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, Firefly, Spike and Megan.
BENTLEY: (covering his eyes) 'No, not the original My Little Ponies!'
SNEERVORT: 'Ponies? That's not right.'
His eyes lit up, and the ponies, Spike and Megan, they all changed back into purple mist. Then the mist changed into an army of bears, all wearing medieval armour. And armed with swords and axes.
SNEERVORT: 'Now that's more like it. Alright my warriors. Destroy this fool!'
Bentley got scared as the army advanced on him.
SNEERVORT: 'Wait!'
The army stopped.
SNEERVORT: 'I've changed my mind.'
BENTLEY: 'Phew.'
SNEERVORT: 'I'll destroy him myself!'
Bentley screamed, as he looked up in horror. Sneervort's eyes lit up, and fired directly at Bentley, and the whole area was shrouded in red.
END OF NIGHTMARE

THE RACCOONS' HOME: BENTLEY'S ROOM
Bentley woke up screaming. Lisa ran in, wearing her nightgown.
LISA: 'Bentley, what's wrong?'
BENTLEY: (freaking out) 'Nightmare. Wizard school. Sneervort. Ponies. Danger.'
LISA: 'You had a nightmare because of Harry Potter, didn't you? Now you understand why it was a PG-13 movie? You wouldn't have been able to see it without me.'
BENTLEY: 'Yes, I know.'

SATURDAY: K-N-O-X TV STUDIO
Mr. Knox sat at his desk, as a dog butler walked up to him.
BUTLER: 'The applicants are all lined up, Sir.'
MR. KNOX: 'Then we are ready to begin auditioning.'
A young male bear walked in, and the dog gave him a bottle of Ripling Pond Soda. And the bear held it up.
MR. KNOX: 'And action.'
BEAR: 'Ripling Pond Soda. Juuuuuuuuust drink it.'
MR. KNOX: 'Great performance. But not exactly what I was looking for. I'm Sorry. Next.'
Next person was a cat girl.
CAT: (talking with a sexy voice) 'Ripling Pond Soda. Just drink it.'
MR. KNOX: 'I'm afraid it sounds too risqué for our target audience. Next.'
The next applicant was a young male duck.
DUCK: 'Ripling Pond Soda. Just QUACK!'
MR. KNOX: 'Next.'
A mole wearing glasses was next.
MOLE: 'Okay. I like Firefly. But I also like Rainbow Dash. But which is better? There's only one way to find out. FIGHT!'
MR. KNOX: 'We're shooting an ad for Ripling Pond Soda.'
MOLE: 'Oh. How embarrassing.'
MR. KNOX: 'Indeed it is. Next.'

MUSIC SCENE: LISA LOUGHEED & CURTIS KING JR: Here I Go Again
More applicants including an aardvark kid, a wolf boy, a teenage fox and a skunk, who scared everyone out of the room. And Mr. Knox rejected them all.
END OF MUSIC SCENE

Mr Knox was getting tired.
MR. KNOX: 'A lot of the applicants don't exactly have what I'm looking for.'
BUTLER: 'Indeed Sir.'
MR. KNOX: (looking at the list of applicants) 'Who's next? Bert Raccoon.'
Bert Raccoon stepped into the room, and was given a bottle of Ripling Pond Soda. He held it up.
BERT: 'Ripling Pond Soda. Just drink it.'
MR. KNOX: 'Bert, you said it more normal like.'
BERT: 'Really?'
MR. KNOX: 'Yeah, you're the best one yet.'
BERT: 'All right. Hollywood here I come.'
MR. KNOX: 'Hold your horses, Raccoon. There is a last minute applicant. She just showed up.'
BERT: 'Who is it?'
MR. KNOX: (reading the list) 'Michelle Raccoon.'
Michelle ran in.
MICHELLE: 'Hi Bert?'
BERT: 'Michelle? You're auditioning?'
MICHELLE: 'Yeah. I hope to become a good actress some day.'
BERT: 'Really? Well good luck.'
MICHELLE: 'Thank you, Bert.'
MR. KNOX: (to Michelle) 'I trust you know your lines?'
MICHELLE: 'Un-huh.'
MR. KNOX: 'Then all I have to say is "Action".'
MICHELLE: (holding up the bottle) 'Ripling Pond Soda. Just drink it.'
MR. KNOX: 'Now that is excellent. You're hired.'
Bert's face was in shock.

EVERGREEN CINEMA
The Pigs and Alicia, Melanie and Zoza were in the lobby. Lloyd was at the counter.
LLOYD: 'I'd like six tickets to "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2", please.'
Alicia fantasised herself riding on Rainbow Dash back, while Lloyd was below, riding on Applejack. Both ponies from "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic".
LLOYD: (looking up) 'Alicia?'
ALICIA: (looking down) 'Yes Lloyd?'
LLOYD: 'I got the tickets.'
Alicia snapped out of her daydream and saw Lloyd standing in front of her, with their tickets.
ALICIA: 'Oh. Then let's go.'
The six pigs made their way to the cinema, where the movie was being shown.

K-N-O-X TV STUDIO
Bert sat on a bench, sulking, and Mr. Knox and Michelle walked up to him.
MR. KNOX: 'Don't worry, Bert. You did a good job as well, so I'm giving you a check for five-hundred dollars, right now.'
He handed Bert the check.
BERT: (taking the check) 'Wow. Thank you, Mr. Knox. And Michelle, good luck with the commercial. I know you'll do great.'
MICHELLE: 'Thanks Bert.'

OUTSIDE
NARRATOR: 'At the end, Bert Raccoon got his check for his amazing talent, even if Michelle got the part. With Bert working part time for Schaeffer and Mr. Willow, as well as the journalist for the Evergreen Standard, who knows what his next part time job will lead him?

THE SNEER MANSION: CYRIL'S OFFICE
Cyril was talking on his phone.
CYRIL: 'That's great, Cedric. Michelle got the part. Knox told me about it earlier today. Hope you and Sophia are having a good summer vacation. Have I seen the last Harry Potter movie? Not yet. Ingrid and I are gonna see it next week. I heard there's something important about Snape, but I wanna see it for myself. Hope you come home soon. Bye.'
He hung up the phone. Then the Pigs ran in.
LLOYD: 'Boss. You'll never guess what happened with Professor Snape.'
Cyril waved his hands and shook his head, gesturing them to stop.
FLOYD: 'Snape was a good guy this whole time. He was protecting Harry.'
CYRIL: (quietly) 'No no.'
BOYD: 'And Snape killing Dumbledore was really planned by Dumbledore himself.'
Cyril growled.

OUTSIDE THE MANSION
Cyril screamed, so loudly, the birds in the trees around the mansion took to the sky and flew away.


THE END


MUSIC
LISA LOUGHEED & CURTIS KING JR: Here I Go Again
LISA LOUGHEED: Run With Us


30.8.2011